When unknown people know about my boyfriend, usually his first response is to stay in shock, they get confused and then they start asking a list of silly things. No, I'm not dating an ex-con and no, it's not part of my family either. I'm just in a distance relationship. And by long distance, I mean a very, very long distance like crossing an entire ocean, in a nonstop flight.
Although it is clear that it is not a normal situation nor is it the ideal, I am still impressed by the total disbelief that I find when I share the details of my love life. Many people can not understand why I'm losing my best 20's in a relationship with a guy I barely see.
Apparently they still can not understand how a relationship can be based on verbal communication instead of physical stimulation. They doubt the future of our relationship and the ability we both have to remain faithful to each other.
Yes, I have to admit that it is very difficult to go out with someone almost exclusively through Skype.
I often experience deep sadness when I realize that I am far away from him and I want our relationship to be normal. Even when we are physically together, there is always a small bit of sadness present, for we both know that it is only a fleeting moment.
Most of the time I feel trapped in a routine; My life is like the classic cliché of not being able to live with it, but you can not live without it. But really, as difficult as it may be, I do not regret anything. In fact, every day that goes by, even the most complicated ones, I realize that I could not have made a better decision than to try it. I have learned to appreciate my long distance relationship and the opportunities it offers me.
I've realized that if you're going to be in a relationship at a distance, there's no better time to do it than when you're in your twenties. Maybe you still do not understand, I'll explain it to you: as a person in their twenties, I'm quite new in the real world. Until this moment in my life I have had parents, teachers and various advisors who have helped guide me in difficult decisions.
In fact, my whole life has been like a complicated game Simon says: they've been telling me what to do, I listen, and then I do. Up to a point, it's comfortable, but the time has come to move on.
I'm ready to start taking charge of my future, but first, I have to focus. To know who I am, what I want and how I am going to achieve my goals. The next few years will be a crucial moment for me, to be who I really am. Not only in the professional field, but also emotionally and socially.
I love my relationship at a distance because it allows me to have the space to work on myself.
Of course there is a moment of close relationships that work and turn into happy marriages. But, in other cases, they end up suffering. If you never learn to use it on your own, then you will continue to depend on others.
I do not have someone to open up and comfort me when I'm having a bad day. My boyfriend can not come with me at lunchtime when I do not want to eat alone. However, even though I'm only with myself, I'm never really so alone.
I am facing all the difficulties that young adults experience. I learn to survive, to take care of myself and to be independent, which I think is essential.
Of course my boyfriend does not comfort me physically or we can go on a date, but he is with me more than ever with a simple and quick text message.
While I value my time alone, I have never been more grateful for the virtual presence of my boyfriend; He is my safety net and my escape after a difficult day.
The 20 is a stage of self-discovery, and of seeking independence. However, having someone by your side, even if only once in a while, makes everything easier. A distance relationship offers you just that: the opportunity to be on your own without having to feel alone.
One of the most frequent questions that people ask me about my relationship is about what I expect in the future. They ask where we are going to end up; They want to know what our plan is.
My answer is simply one I do not know yet. However, there is something I do know: I could not have found a better person to be by my side supporting me as a young adult, even if he is hundreds of miles away.