Science confirms it: women are not monogamous It seems infidelity is necessary


For many years we have witnessed the repression that has punished women in many aspects, from working life or their human rights, to their sexuality. Although we have advanced a lot in different issues, there are still taboo subjects that persecute the female figure, among them monogamy.

A recent study by David Buss, Ph.D. in Social Psychology at the University of Texas, revealed that human beings are not always guided by following the established patterns of society, since evolution goes beyond that.

Women are NOT monogamous

In an interview with the Sunday TimesDr. Buss stated that the study could suppose the end of the hypothesis that evolution has turned humans into monogamous.

According to the scientist, the ideas that have respect to the way in which human beings develop in their love relationships have been inherited, even there are no studies that demonstrate the certainty that we are genetically predisposed to monogamy.

This means that there is no evidence that human relationships should be exclusively between two people. Buss called this mating strategy.

Breaking up with someone and mating again could be one of the most common characteristics of human mating, but the most important strategy of all.

It is about reproduction and not the idea that a woman needs a man to be happy. He affirmed that women have resorted to the arms of other men when ending a sentimental bond with a person since the beginning of humanity.

For our ancestors, who suffered from diseases, a poor diet and minimal medical care and had a life expectancy of less than 30 years, changing sex partners and seeking a more adequate one was necessary.

It is not that women get bored or seek more pleasure, it is that it was basic to survive and evolve as a species. In fact, there is a phenomenon called the loving bedroom: is when people look for other possible partners in case their current relationship does not work or ends. Women are also given this as well as men and, according to the study, are predisposed to have a plan B or C.

The conclusion reached by scientists regarding this theory suggests that the infidelity of women in times past was useful and even required, since there was no certainty that the men with whom they had a sentimental bond, who went hunting to find food, would return.

They could die, mate with others, abandon them or simply lose value as companions. Having other reserve men was not an obstacle to the good of all, but the opposite, an intelligent way to improve the future, with a probable second pairing.

The idea that women need to have only one man forever, while they need to be unfaithful and replace them quickly, is behind many prejudices and personal and historical errors.

If we pay attention to the study, maybe it's time to leave this thought in the past. When a woman ends a relationship, she does not have to mourn for a long time; the scientific data says exactly the opposite.

Esther Perel | Modern Love and Relationships | SXSW 2018 (January 2021)