I have stopped drinking coffee because I have discovered that it causes me insomnia and it is there between the sheets when I think about it the most. I wish I did not feel this jealousy anymore that poison my soul, knowing you in the arms of someone else; I would like to close my eyes and wake up in a new dawn of promises to fulfill, far from all those kisses that today I know so bitter.
And yet, if it were not for the memory of the smell of your hair and your smile when I did something silly, my life would be meaningless. I still have tattooed in my memory the stories we invented, where you were the prince who saved me from my prison and took me to live far away, to fantasy lands and we loved each other until the end of time.
I do not know whether to say that it was stupid to believe in the words of someone who did not know how to value me or just have the habit of trusting that everything can go better than planned; but I believed in you, I trusted in you, I gave you everything I had and more. It was not enough to make you understand that you had to be by my side.
You failed me, you left and broke my heart ruthlessly, I saw my illusion wither, while I spent the afternoon writing sad love letters. You were present in every minute of my day, even though it was only your shadow clouding the sunlight.
I still have your saliva in my mouth and your lies in my ears, so I decided to leave the coffee, because only in my dreams are we together again, loving each other as we had to be, smiling at each other, looking into each other's eyes, delving into our thoughts.
In my dreams you are the person that I once thought you were, my illusions are fulfilled one by one, you continue to undress me and seduce me with your verbiage. Only there you belong to me completely, only there I am still yours.
However, I have realized that you are a disease and that an intervention is necessary before falling into madness; I have understood that it is time to let you go, before there is no more exit. I can not remain tied to the memory; I can not, nor do I want to continue loving a man who succumbed to the lips of other women.
I feel that in the attempt my life will go away, but it is something that I must do, because I deserve to be free, keep flying and find other horizons, where I will surely come across the feelings I had decided to give you, and now they will be mine again for Give them to someone else. With all my heart, I wish you good luck, but now is the time to make my dreams come true.